Stray Thread

February 3, 2023

What is the meaning of all this?

In the station of the one I hate.

Lyrics

CAIN

I see the distorted reflection of me
It calls to me, telling me that I’ll be replaced
I chose an entourage with similarities and differences
But in the end they’d prefer somebody else

One who could match exactly who they were
I’m not the one they want
So maybe I should change
They’ve got me surrounded
I must fit myself into the mold shaped like their hearts

The shadow is coming after me again
The pattern hangs in the air all around
I’m just a stray thread falling into place
In this inescapable providential fate

I brought you into my self, my inner world
The pattern grows stronger; I can’t fight back
I’m just a stray thread falling into place
In this inescapable providential fate

Now there’s no place left for me in this harmony
I wanted you to be here to remind me of who I am
But now you’re here, I’m losing sight of myself

I know you want to stitch the pattern closed
Defeat my last stronghold
You’ll forge the strongest bond with each other, not me
And I will be cast out from these links I had formed

The shadow is coming after me again
The pattern hangs in the air all around
I’m just a stray thread falling into place
In this inescapable providential fate

I brought you into my self, my inner world
The pattern grows stronger; I can’t fight back
I’m just a stray thread falling into place
In this inescapable providential fate

The prison door of this harmony swings closed
You’ve gotten under my skin and blurred the line between us
Must I burn these bridges from here on out?
We’ll all be reduced to nothing, the inner world torn to pieces

The shadow is coming after me again
The pattern hangs in the air all around
I’m just a stray thread falling into place
In this inescapable providential fate

I brought you into my self, my inner world
The pattern grows stronger; I can’t fight back
I’m just a stray thread falling into place
In this inescapable providential fate

Commentary

Jerome had an acquaintance who I took to be just another denizen of the land of diverging realities. I didn't think much of it at first. But in the summer of 4 CE I decided to pay them a visit, and I found out that they make music just like me.

My first thought was wow, maybe I should make them part of the Harmony Brigade! But then I was hit with the fear of what would actually happen if that came true. They're a bit like Sarah, but more brash and insolent. Plus, I felt like they were more like the other Harmony Brigade members than me. I suspected that including them would break the entire thing apart as everyone else bonds over their shared commonalities.

As my mind raced, it reached the conclusion that I needed to change my identity to fit a so-called "pattern" that the four of them had conjured with the traits that they shared, or that I was already part of the "pattern" and in denial. These thoughts would alternate as though attacking me from all sides, or like the words themselves were being woven together in a tight fabric of their own.

I was so overwhelmed that I ran away from that station as fast as I could. I eventually reached that space in between everything, and there I slumped against a ruined wall. After a while, I start to calm down, and that's when the lyrics to "Stray Thread" began to form in my head and on my lips.

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